Giving & Receiving: Simple Exchanges

Beginner

Giving & Receiving: Simple Exchanges

In Japanese, the verbs for "giving" and "receiving" are nuanced and depend heavily on who is giving to whom. Understanding these verbs is crucial for polite and accurate communication. This lesson will cover the basics, but remember that there's a subtle social hierarchy aspect at play.

Key Verbs: The Giving & Receiving Trio

  • あげる (ageru) — to give (to someone outside your "in-group"). This is the most basic "to give" verb.
  • もらう (morau) — to receive (from someone). This describes the act of receiving.
  • くれる (kureru) — to give (to me or someone in my in-group). This emphasizes the giver doing something for you/your group.

"In-group" vs. "Out-group"

Understanding the concept of "in-group" (内 uchi) and "out-group" (外 soto) is essential for mastering these verbs. Generally, your in-group includes:

  • Family members (especially immediate family)
  • Close friends
  • Coworkers (within your own company)
  • Members of your club/team

Out-group includes:

  • Strangers
  • Customers (if you're an employee)
  • People from other companies

These boundaries can be fluid depending on the context and your relationship with the other person. Kureru tends to imply the giver is doing you a favour. Because of this, it is not common to use kureru for someone of higher social status giving to someone of lower status as that implies indebtedness from the higher status person.

Basic Sentence Patterns: Deconstructing the Grammar

Let's break down the sentence structure for each verb. Pay close attention to the particles used.

1. あげる (ageru): Giving Outward

[Giver] は [Receiver] に [Object] を あげます。
[Giver] wa [Receiver] ni [Object] o agemasu.

  • は (wa): Topic marker (indicates the subject, what the sentence is about)
  • に (ni): To (indicates the indirect object, the recipient)
  • を (o): Direct object marker (indicates what is being given)
  • あげます (agemasu): Give (polite form)

Examples:

  • わたしは ともだちに プレゼントを あげます。
    Watashi wa tomodachi ni purezento o agemasu.
    I give a present to my friend.

  • 妹は 先生に 花を あげました。 (Past tense)
    Imōto wa sensei ni hana o agemashita.
    My younger sister gave flowers to the teacher.

  • 田中さんは 部長に お土産を あげます。
    Tanaka-san wa buchō ni omiyage o agemasu. Mr. Tanaka gives a souvenir to the department manager.

Important note on using ageru with superiors: While grammatically correct, avoid using ageru to describe giving something to someone of higher social status (like your boss) without additional context. It can sound presumptuous. You would be better off using sashiageru, which is the humble form of ageru, or an alternative phrasing, to show respect. This will be covered later.

2. もらう (morau): Receiving Inward

[Receiver] は [Giver] に/から [Object] を もらいます。
[Receiver] wa [Giver] ni/kara [Object] o moraimasu.

  • は (wa): Topic marker (the receiver is the subject of the sentence)
  • に (ni): From (indicates the source of the gift, can also be から)
  • から (kara): From (also indicates the source; kara implies a more active giving, whereas ni can indicate a more passive reception)
  • を (o): Direct object marker (what is being received)
  • もらいます (moraimasu): Receive (polite form)

Examples:

  • わたしは せんせいに 本を もらいました。 (Past tense)
    Watashi wa sensei ni hon o moraimashita.
    I received a book from my teacher.

  • 息子は 父から お金を もらいます。
    Musuko wa chichi kara okane o moraimasu.
    My son receives money from his father.

  • 彼女は 彼氏に 指輪を もらいました。
    Kanojo wa kareshi ni yubiwa o moraimashita.
    She received a ring from her boyfriend.

  • 私は会社からボーナスをもらいました。 Watashi wa kaisha kara bōnasu o moraimashita. I received a bonus from the company.

3. くれる (kureru): Giving to Me/Us

[Giver] は [Receiver (me/us)] に [Object] を くれます。
[Giver] wa [Receiver (me/us)] ni [Object] o kuremasu.

  • は (wa): Topic marker (the giver is the subject)
  • に (ni): To (the receiver, always you or someone in your "in-group")
  • を (o): Direct object marker (what is being given)
  • くれます (kuremasu): Gives (to me/us; polite form)

Important: Kureru is used when someone gives something to you or someone closely related to you (family, close friend, coworker). It implies a benefit or favor done for you.

Examples:

  • ともだちは わたしに チョコレートを くれました。 (Past tense)
    Tomodachi wa watashi ni chokorēto o kuremashita.
    My friend gave me chocolate.

  • 母は 妹に セーターを くれます。
    Haha wa imōto ni sētā o kuremasu.
    My mother gives my younger sister a sweater.

  • 山田さんは 私に ケーキを くれました。 Yamada-san wa watashi ni kēki o kuremashita. Mr. Yamada gave me a cake.

  • 先生は私たちに宿題をくれました。 Sensei wa watashitachi ni shukudai o kuremashita. The teacher gave us homework.

Beyond the Basics: Nuances and Considerations

  • Politeness Levels: The verbs covered here are in the polite form (-masu form). There are plain forms (ageru, morau, kureru) used in casual conversations with close friends and family. But for formal settings, it is best to use the -masu form.

  • Humble and Honorific Forms: To show respect or humility, especially when giving to superiors, you would use humble (謙譲語 kenjōgo) or honorific (尊敬語 sonkeigo) forms. For example, instead of ageru, you might use sashiageru (差し上げる), which is the humble form. While we won't delve deeply into these now, be aware that they exist.

  • Implied Gratitude: When someone uses kureru, it often implies a certain level of gratitude on your part. It's a subtle way of acknowledging that you've received a favor.

  • Combining with Te-form: These verbs can also be combined with the te-form of other verbs to describe acts of giving and receiving that involve actions.

    • 教えてあげる (oshiete ageru) - to teach (as a favour to someone)
    • 作ってくれる (tsukutte kureru) - to make (something for me/us)
    • 手伝ってもらう (tetsudatte morau) - to receive help (from someone)

More Example Sentences

Here are a few more example sentences to help you understand the usage of these verbs:

  • 私は弟に古い漫画をあげました。 Watashi wa otōto ni furui manga o agemashita. I gave my younger brother an old manga.

  • 姉は友達から誕生日プレゼントをもらいました。 Ane wa tomodachi kara tanjōbi purezento o moraimashita. My older sister received a birthday present from her friend.

  • 父は私に新しい自転車を買ってくれました。 Chichi wa watashi ni atarashii jitensha o katte kuremashita. My father bought me a new bicycle. (He did the favour of buying me a bike)

  • 彼女は彼に手作りのクッキーをあげました。 Kanojo wa kare ni tezukuri no kukkī o agemashita. She gave her boyfriend homemade cookies.

  • 私は先生にレポートを直してもらいました。 Watashi wa sensei ni repōto o naoshite moraimashita. I had the teacher correct my report. (I received the favour of having my report corrected)

  • 友達は私に傘を貸してくれました。 Tomodachi wa watashi ni kasa o kashite kuremashita. My friend lent me an umbrella. (My friend did me the favor of lending me an umbrella)

Practice Exercises

Let's put what you've learned into practice!

Translate the following into Japanese. Think carefully about who is giving to whom!
  1. My older brother gave me a new game.
  2. I received a birthday card from my grandmother.
  3. I gave my teacher a thank you gift.
  4. My friend helped me with my homework.
  5. The company president gave the employees bonuses.
Answers
  1. 兄は私に新しいゲームをくれました。 (Ani wa watashi ni atarashii gēmu o kuremashita.) - My older brother gave me a new game.
  2. 私は祖母から誕生日カードをもらいました。 (Watashi wa sobo kara tanjōbi kādo o moraimashita.) - I received a birthday card from my grandmother.
  3. 私は先生に感謝のプレゼントをあげました。(Watashi wa sensei ni kansha no purezento o agemashita.) - I gave my teacher a thank you gift. Depending on the context and the nature of the gift, consider if sashiagemasu is more appropriate.
  4. 友達は私の宿題を手伝ってくれました。 (Tomodachi wa watashi no shukudai o tetsudatte kuremashita.) - My friend helped me with my homework. (They did the favour of helping.) This uses the te-form.
  5. 社長は社員にボーナスをあげました。(Shachō wa shain ni bōnasu o agemashita.) - The company president gave the employees bonuses. Because this is from the company president (higher status) to the employees (lower status), ageru works here.
Fill in the blanks with the correct verb (あげる, もらう, くれる) in the correct form.
  1. 私は友達に本を __________。
  2. 先生は私に宿題を __________。
  3. 私は母から誕生日プレゼントを __________。
Answers
  1. 私は友達に本を あげます。(Watashi wa tomodachi ni hon o agemasu.)
  2. 先生は私に宿題を くれました。(Sensei wa watashi ni shukudai o kuremashita.)
  3. 私は母から誕生日プレゼントを もらいました。 (Watashi wa haha kara tanjōbi purezento o moraimashita.)
True or False: Is the following sentence correct? (explain your reasoning)

私が先生に本をくれました。 Watashi ga sensei ni hon o kuremashita.

Answer

False. Kureru is used when someone gives something to you or someone in your group. The sentence translates to "I gave a book to the teacher", but it incorrectly uses kuremashita. The correct verb would be agemashita (あげました). The correct sentence would be: 私は先生に本をあげました。